Omas

are great because just as you wake up they say, if you get up now you can make a quick trip to Home Depot before you drop the kids off at school and go to work. Quick and Home Depot can those three words go in the same sentence? Aren't they an oxymoron? I thought it was a poor idea, particularly when she said she would dress the kids for school. It can take Oma up to an hour per child to dress them. But I thought it would be easier to go along with her plan than argue.

I did luck out at Home Depot and found an employee who was willing to walk me down every aisle of the store until we found what I was looking for. Along that walk, my money fell out of my pocket, unbeknownst to me. Forty-five minutes later, I returned home moneyless but with the needed item only to discover Jory is only half-dressed and Rowan is watching TV. Okay, Oma definitely is taking them to school. I drop of my Home Depot purchase and run out the door so I can make it to work on time.

Nine hours later, I rush out the door to take the kids to the first AWANA of the year. I call the house to see if they are at home or at Aunt Linda's. The phone is busy so I know they are at home. I drive swiftly yet safely home only to see my son walking around with pjs on and Rowan playing on the bed with the baby.

They didn't go to school? They didn't go to school. I didn't even bother to ask why because I knew the answer. She didn't feel like driving them the 8 blocks down and 2 blocks over to take them. Plus I'm sure it was cold outside and the baby does have a cough and a runny nose.

"Why didn't you call and tell me to get them dress?"

"I've been calling for the last hour. The phone is off the hook."

"Oh, it is? I was on the phone earlier."

"It's probably been off the hook since then."

"Is that why nobody called?"


I look down to see the phone off the hook underneath the sofa she's sitting on. I guess we'll go to AWANA next week.

When does she go back to work again? The idea of retirement truly frightens me.